birthdays birthdays yay

is it normal for me to be so excited about my baby girls first birthday?
i dont know, but im already planning shit (the theme) and got a date picked, and ive started inviting people. family mostly lol.
andrew wants tamaras first birthday gift from daddy to be a pair of diamond earrings(since its her birthstone). not from us, but from him lol. he figures i wanna get her something fluffy. well i do. i kinda feel left out, but, i spose hes entitled to giving her something just from him. meh, shes gonna get tons of stuff. im almost afraid to buy presents b/c i dont know what others are gonna get for her lol. im sure shes gonna get strawberry shortcake stuff for her room. i know she is. ive told my mom and my grandma (paula) that we really like the SS stuff. whats good things to get for a 1 yr old?

i hope the weather gets nicer soon. tamara is enthralled with the outside and is worse than the cats when it comes to an open door lol. its like vroom, poof, theres tamara at the door tryin to crawl out. and its all rainy and muddy and snowy and icky >.<

i love how she (seems) to love me most. 5 people ina room,(me, andrew, theresa, bessie, tabatha) and tamara crawls to, turns to, reaches for me. i love it. when shes in my arms she'll lay her head on my chest/shoulder. it makes me feel so special i just wanna cry in happiness lol. sometimes she wants other people. she was at andrews gma for a few days(so i could get unstressed) i missed her so bad, but OMG it helped me wind down. and after the first day we had to go visit her b/c she was missing us so bad. she cheered up INSTANTLY once we got there. but shes safe and clean and fed and i needed the break bad, so after a few hours, we went back home. if you ever need a break(and dont feel bad, most people need a break) and you trust whoever is willing to watch you baby for a day or 2, take them up on that offer. you will feel tons better. i feel... rejuvinated. like i just went on vacation. which i spose i kinda did.